Civilized Men
by KeepSaying
Summary: Clem turns up on the Weller's doorstep unannounced to give Jane a present and finds Kurt home alone. About as awkward as you imagine but with a fluffy reward at the end. One-Shot.


**A/N** : I'm on semester break and it's showing! I've got wayy too much time on my hands. Now, this is about three fourth awkwardness and one fourth Jeller fluff. Enjoy! Tell me what you think, since I find it harder to write that much dialogue.

* * *

Nothing.

That was what Kurt was planning on doing this afternoon and it felt amazing to get to lay on the couch in his sweats, a still unread book in his hands and no obligations whatsoever. Apart from being responsible for dinner preparation today, he had no tasks to complete and nowhere to be. A luxury if he ever knew one.

He was halfway through _The Midnight Bell_ by Jack Higgins when the doorbell rang. Tugging a piece of paper he found lying around on the coffee table into the book Patterson had got him after learning of his liking for Tom Clancy books, saying that if you loved one you loved both, he got up his thoughts still with Sean Dillon, the Irish main character in the books.

Maybe Jane was coming home already? A quick glance at the clock told him it had been almost two hours since she had gone out with Tasha and Patterson but surely she wouldn't ring?

Pulling open the door he froze at the person who was standing there, a fist raised halfway to knock on the door that had just gotten pulled out of his reach.

In front of him was standing no other than Clem Hanh, ever the cool pose with one hand in the pocket of his jeans and the other currently dropping to his side. He didn't seem any less startled than Kurt felt watching the man he had had no interest in seeing ever again standing on his doorstep.

Clem broke the uncomfortable silence first, clearing his throat "I didn't know you'd be here."

"Is that so." Kurt crossed his arms in front of his chest and stared at the other man with a longer, greyer stubble than he had himself in a casual leather jacket. "Well, I'm here. As far as I know I live here."

"I can see that" Clem looked at his sweats and the worn FBI t-shirt, he was currently wearing, pointedly "I mean I thought you weren't going to be home."

Kurt's frown deepened as he shifted his weight onto the other leg, trying to decide how he felt about this scenario. "Where else was I going to be?"

Clearing his throat again Clem looked down for the first time since they had started their staring contest and almost seemed embarrassed. "Your phone is currently in Manhattan."

It was all Kurt could do to stare at the other man in disbelieve. This conversation got crazier by the minute and he wasn't sure if maybe he had fallen asleep at some point and this was simply an incredibly awkward dream.

"You're tracking my phone?" he managed to get out after a pause, with an appropriately accusatory undertone.

Clem simply shrugged his shoulders and looked back up, meeting the boring eyes with his equally intense brown-eyed stare "It's what I do. I wanted to avoid a situation like this by tracking both yours and Jane's phone to find a minute you're not around. I didn't want to sabotage your relationship."

"Really" Kurt raised an eyebrow at the man, an unsettling feeling in his stomach at the declaration and whatever that meant "Are you doing that often?"

"You mean, did I meet with Jane since we last parted ways?" Clem clarified, seeming to find this highly amusing. "No. I stayed away just like she asked me to."

"And why are you here now?" Mustering the other guy from head to toe, both of them still standing on opposite sides of the door step, Kurt looked for any indication what for heaven's sake had brought him here because he was almost certain that he didn't like it. Come to think of it, he already didn't like this at all and sadly, he had given up the hope that this was simply a bad dream.

"I was about to come to that" Clem replied nonchalantly "I wanted to give her a birthday present."

A birthday present? He was completely taken aback by that turn of events.

"Jane's birthday isn't for another 4 months" he told him after he was done sorting his thoughts. Was he trying to hide his ulterior motives behind something like that?

But Kurt had always prided himself on his ability to read people and, as hard as it was for him to read Clem, he could see that he did seem honestly surprised at that new information.

Instead of arguing with him he mumbled, more to himself, "I should've known she wasn't going to go with her real birthday" and was about to turn around when Kurt's voice stopped him.

"Wait" he said, his arms dropping to his sides as he was trying to remember the exact date "What day is today?" he asked, deeply in thoughts.

"4th of September" Clem replied in a heartbeat. "Look, I'm sorry to have bothered you. I wanted to give her a little something but it's not that important and I can leave it with you. I should've done my research."

Kurt had to bite back a grin when he realized that he was actually trying to back off, seeming very embarrassed and self-conscious. "It's okay. She gave you the right day in some way." When he only got a confused and rather annoyed look at the cryptic statement, he clarified further "4th of September is the day she got dropped off in Time Square. The start of her third life if you will. At least that's what she always called it. So you're only partly wrong."

Frowning, Clem put both his hands in his pockets again and pondered about that for a bit "So, basically it's when the two of you met for the first time? Is it some kind of anniversary?" He didn't seem too thrilled at the idea.

"I guess" Kurt shrugged "Never really felt like celebrating the day she got out of a bag, drugged and with no memories whatsoever." Nor had they ever been together for that date to give it any thought. They hadn't even gotten to celebrate their first wedding anniversary as a couple.

"Drugged in a bag? That does not sound like the Jane I know" Clem repeated incredulously and only then did Kurt remember that he didn't even know how much the man knew about his wife's history. Some very primal, very possessive part of his brain enjoyed the fact that he didn't even knew the basics more than it should have.

Kurt was still deciding what to reply to that, unsure what he wanted or was allowed to disclose to this guy who had the means to find out anything and still wasn't an official of any sort, when Clem once more, disrupted his train of thought.

"I'll leave you to it, now. Sorry again for bothering…" He was about to turn around when Kurt found himself stop him from leaving once again.

Why he was doing that, he wasn't quite sure. Maybe he wanted Jane to have a friend who made her, badly timed, birthday presents or maybe he just wanted to be there when Clem met with his wife and not have to worry about him tracking their phones again and meeting her without his knowledge. A little bit of both, he decided, when he told the guy he'd rather never have to see again to come inside to wait for Jane's return.

Once they were both sat in the living room, Kurt still in his sweats and Clem still in his leather jacket and with a steaming pot of coffee each, they fell into yet another stiff silence that, once more, Clem broke.

"Why is your phone in Manhattan anyway?" he asked, after his gaze had travelled around the room and settled back on his host once more.

Kurt raised an eyebrow "So you can spy on me a little easier next time?"

Clem rolled his eyes "Jane's phone is in this apartment" he replied matter-of-factly "That's why I thought she'd be here and you wouldn't. Now, my guess is either you two exchanged your phones for whatever reason, or" he raised a hand to stop Kurt, who was just opening his mouth, from interrupting "What I believe is, a lot more likely, one of you grabbed the wrong phone today."

Nodding, Kurt took a sip from his still fairly hot beverage "Both our phones were on the table and she took the wrong one when we left work. Since she went out with friends afterwards and I drove home, I only realized it when she sent me a message from my own phone."

"So you have each other's passwords? That's some pretty serious trust" he said innocently, while lightly blowing the steam off his coffee.

Kurt was about to remind him that they were married and that that usually meant that their relationship had to found on some sort of trust and that knowing each other's passwords was literally the least of their worries when the infuriating man started talking again already. For someone who had wanted to leave after he had realized Jane wasn't home, he seemed to be enjoying this little chat a lot more than Kurt currently was.

"You two have a kid? Wow, I really do not know anything about this woman."

Damn well he didn't, Kurt wanted to blurt out but managed to restrain himself, reminding himself that he invited him to stay for a coffee and he would have to deal with it now. Maybe this was a good training for self-control if nothing else.

"She's my daughter" he said instead, letting his gaze travel to the pictures of Bethany all over the room and lingered on one of her with Jane. "Jane's like a second mom to her, though. She's great." He smiled involuntarily at the memory of the brief moment they had had in Colorado as a family before everything had happened.

Clem followed his gaze and grimaced – unbeknownst to Kurt – slightly "Very domestic" he said with a hint of sarcasm in his voice that Kurt chose to ignore.

He was happy to hear Jane's phone chime up with a message from his phone, telling him that she was going to be home in a bit, once more hope blossomed in him that he wouldn't have to spend much more time with the man next to him.

"Jane's gonna be here in about half an hour" he told Clem, getting up and moving towards the kitchen.

Clem followed his movements and when Kurt started getting vegetables from the fridge and turned to get a chopping board and a knife from one of the drawers, he got up and after lingering next to the counter awkwardly for a moment he cleared his throat "Need a hand with that?"

Kurt paused mid-movement, staring at his opposite for a whole minute before slowly nodding his head "You can chop the vegetables if you want." Handing him the knife and chopping board he paused for another moment, trying to decide how big the chances were that he would find that knife plunged into his back and then chose to get back to preparing the rice.

They worked without talking for a while, the consistent chopping, boiling water and extractor hood the only sounds that cut through the silence and despite himself Kurt had to admit that this was the most non-awkward time they had spent together all evening. He suspected that was due to the fact the other man wasn't talking for once.

He had just finished frying the veggies Clem had so dutifully chopped and threw the half-cooked rice into the wok pan as well and was just pouring a cup of vegan broth onto the food when he heard the key turn in the lock and Jane entered their apartment.

Apparently she was still taking off her shoes and shutting the door because she hadn't seen Clem yet, who stood next to the counter as stiff as a statue.

"This smells delicious" Kurt heard her voice call from the hallway as he walked around the counter and the other person to meet his wife. "I could honestly eat a horse. You are not gonna believe where Tasha and Patterson dragged me to."

She saw him first and a smile broke out on her face that was a little pink from the unusually cold September air "I've missed you" she grinned up at him and leaned forward to kiss him when three things happened all at once.

Kurt started talking, Jane looked over his shoulder and froze and Clem cleared his throat.

"What is going on?" she demanded to know, looking from one man to the other and back again "Is something wrong? Why is he here?"

"It's-" Kurt started to explain but was cut off by Clem who had moved towards them so they now stood in a weird triangle, facing each other.

"I thought today was your birthday and wanted to drop by to give you a little something but instead your husband was the one opening the door."

Jane's gaze that had been trained on her former K&R partner, now moved to her husband who simply shrugged.

"I thought it'd be a waste if you hadn't gotten that birthday present, so I told him to stay" he explained neutrally.

She stared at him incredulously "And how come you didn't tell me he was here so I could've gotten here sooner? How long have you been here?" she directed at Clem.

"A little over half an hour" he replied, nodding towards Kurt "I think he didn't want to ruin your date with your friends so he took it upon himself to babysit me."

Again her gaze fell on Kurt who, again, shrugged and she couldn't bite back a smile at his innocent expression. The fact that he would spend time alone with Clem of all people was saying so much about his selflessness and in that moment her heart grew even bigger for her husband.

"Well" Clem interrupted the couple who had locked eyes and seemed to be leaving this room mentally "Thank you for your hospitality" he said after they looked at him again "I'm just going to go give you your present and I'll be out of your hair in no time."

"Stay" Kurt shook his head, not believing he was actually saying this but gestured towards the kitchen "You helped cook it, you can stay to eat it. And I've just gotten used to the awkward atmosphere around here, wouldn't want to mess with that."

"Wait" Jane called after him as he went back into the kitchen to check on dinner "You two _cooked together_?"

Now it was Clem who shrugged as he stood kind of helplessly in the hallway.

"Okay" Jane could still only stare at him. She raised the shopping bags she was still holding on to "I'm just gonna bring these into our bedroom and… I'll be right back" she paused and then shook her head more to herself than to anyone else and left the living room.

Kurt had listened to the exchange more closely than he'd liked to admit and was relieved when they seemed just as awkward in the situation as he felt. He pulled out plates and cutlery for three persons from the kitchen drawers and put them on the counter, watching Clem who still stood in the same place Jane had left him a minute ago.

"Do you want to set the table?" he called to the man, frowning on the inside how normal this seemed when it was anything but. "Dinner's almost ready."

Clem rubbed his hand over his beard and then pinched himself in the cheek, unsure whether this was really happening. When he didn't wake up he resigned to his fate and turned around to do as Weller had requested. Setting the table for the woman he had thought could be his future, her husband and himself. What a crazy world.

When Jane came back, the table was set and the two man were already sitting, facing each other on the round table. There was one chair left in the golden middle and she had no other choice but to take it, glad Kurt had thought to bring the Bourbon as well. She had a feeling she was going to need it.

She raised her glass awkwardly but before her mind could come up with some sort of toast, Kurt helped her out "To eating in … company."

"Cheers" she heard Clem mutter on her other side and took a sip from the tumbler.

They ate in silence after that, only occasionally saying how good the meal was but otherwise everyone kept to their own plate and tried to ignore the huge elephant in the room.

Jane was the last to finish eating – the shopping spree really had worn her out – and watched her husband watch the other man and Clem returning the favor, until he broke the silence.

"So" he began "How's Avery?"

She almost choked on her food but let Kurt answer "She's fine. Very stubborn and still doesn't fully trust us, but apart from that she's good, considering."

Clem nodded "Guess she takes after her mother. I'm glad to hear she's alright."

After that they both went quiet again and Jane couldn't even begin to fathom how these two had spent over half an hour in the same room with no other distraction. Had they talked at all?

Hurriedly she finished the remainders on her plate and shot Kurt a smile "This was great, thank you" then looked at Clem, "And you too, I guess."

"I'm going to clean the table" Kurt announced and stood up, picking up the plates and motioned for Jane to stay put when she made a move to help him. She tried to capture his gaze but he was looking at Clem again, obviously trying to decide something and when he did, he shook his head "I've got it, it's fine." With that he left them in the living room and went to work out of ear shot in the kitchen.

Clem's look followed the man and went back to rest on Jane "He must really trust you."

She nodded tersely "We're working on it." She sighed "Why did you come here, Clem?"

As if he had just remembered the reason for his visit he opened the leather jacket he was still wearing and pulled something from the inside pocket. Very carefully he held the piece of paper in his hand and placed it in hers.

"I was in South Africa for a job a few weeks ago and I remembered you saying that you were originally from Johannesburg and had been in some orphanage at some point" he told her "Of course, you didn't even tell me your real birthday but I didn't know that then" he teased her lightly and followed how gaze that moved over the photograph he had given her.

"I've found this in some Lost and Found storage in a town near Johannesburg. The owner of the house – it's a daycare center now – told me it used to be an orphanage and they had kept some of the personal belongings and let me go through them" he explained softly. He could see her eyes becoming glassy with unshed tears, a vulnerable side to her he had never encountered before.

"Well, I saw that little girl and the date on the back said it was taken in 1990 and I thought that could be it" he finished and saw her nod.

"Thank you" Jane whispered, tearing her eyes from the picture of her and Roman – no, Alice and Ian Kruger – for the first time.

Clem smiled, a real warm smile that reached his eyes and that he rarely ever showed anyone "My pleasure" he gave back just as quietly. After just a small moment in which her gaze dropped down to the photo in her hand again he cleared his throat "I think I'm going to leave now. I think that husband of yours will be glad to get rid of me."

She smiled slightly, but didn't argue with him. Instead she got up and wrapped his arms around him for the briefest of moments. "Thank you" she said again "And if you want to give me something again, why don't you just call ahead the next time?"

"I didn't think you'd be happy to see me again. You told me to stay away" he reminded her with no malice in his voice.

Jane nodded "That's probably for the best" she agreed with a look at Kurt who had his back turned to them, cleaning the dishes. "Still, this means a lot."

"You were right" Clem had followed her gaze "You do have a great man."

With that he took a step back, turned around and – more loudly this time – announced "I'm gonna leave you two to it, now. Thank you for the food. Goodbye Jane and Kurt."

Once the door fell close behind him, Jane dropped down onto her chair, feeling more exhausted than she had before, the picture still in her hand. It didn't take long for Kurt to join her, standing behind her, kneading her shoulders to release some of the tension.

She smiled up at him warmly and showed him the photograph. "He found a picture of Ian and Alice" she told him, unnecessarily "Before their family got killed and they were raised to be killing machines."

Kurt pulled his chair closer to her and sat down on it, wrapping both arms around her from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder. "You're not a killing machine" he whispered and pressed a kiss to her neck.

Jane leaned into him, relishing in his touch "I still seem to be awfully good at it."

"You're also awfully good at other things."

"Oh is that so?" she grinned teasingly and turned in his arms "What other things?"

He returned her smile and rested his forehead against hers, pretending to think about that very thoroughly "Like saving lives and being compassionate" he said finally, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead "And being stubborn and always getting your will" he grinned, kissing the tip of her nose "And you're also a little more than average in the kissing department."

She slapped his chest in mock hurt "Only a little more than average?"

"Yes" he agreed "Which is why you need a lot practice. I could help you if you'd like."

"What I'd like" she whispered into his hear, feeling him shudder as he closed his eyes and she pressed a quick peck to his lips "Is for you to take me to bed."

"Aye ma'am" he complied, lifting her up from the chair and carrying her into their bedroom.

Next to their bed she had dropped the bags with her haul and he grinned when he saw them now, spying a pink bag of a lingerie store "Are you going to model them for me tomorrow?" he asked her as he slipped out of his clothes and she did the same, throwing her jeans and t-shirt on the chair in the corner of the room.

"Only if you ask very nicely" she grinned at him, patting the spot beside her, telling him in no uncertain terms to hurry up.

"Bossy" he muttered under his breath when he joined her underneath the covers and pulled her to him.

"I hugged him" she whispered suddenly, just before he could bridge the gap between them and he paused, staring at her in confusion until understanding dawned on him but not before she went ahead and explained it.

"Clem. I hugged him as a good bye."

Pulling back, Kurt watched her intently "Why are you telling me that?"

"Because I don't want any secrets between us anymore and because I wasn't sure whether you'd be angry about it or not which is why I decided it would be better to tell you" she rushed out, glad when he didn't push her away but instead pulled her closer again.

"Thank you for telling me" he said simply.

Her hand went up to cup his cheek and she stroked his stubble lightly, feeling him lean into her touch "You're not mad?"

Kurt shook his head, his eyes never leaving hers but the playful twinkle returned in a matter of seconds "Can I kiss my wife now without her talking about another man? That's kind of a turn off." he asked her playfully.

Jane giggled, closing the distance between them and pressing her lips to his.

"You may."


End file.
